I’m a Career Transformation Coach and Life Counselor. I walk my clients through 5 steps to get unstuck so they can move forward towards creating a brighter future.
In this episode, you will learn about these 5 steps and be given resources and strategies to help you take immediate action.
I believe that if you want to get “unstuck” and truly move your life and career forward towards a brighter horizon, then it’s essential that you take a close look at what you are resisting. As Carl Jung said, “what you resist persists.”
In other words, even our lifelong strategies of thinking ‘harder,’ or further rationalizing, and attempting to ignore our feelings can become ineffective in pushing the pain away.
It is not necessarily a bad place to be in your life. Feelings like disappointment, embarrassment, irritation, resentment, anger, jealousy, and fear, instead of being bad news, can be very clear moments that teach us where it is that we’re holding back.
They teach us to perk up and lean in when we feel we’d rather collapse and back away and serve as messengers that show us with terrifying clarity exactly where we’re stuck.
Resistance is one of the strategies of human behavior that holds us back and keeps us in our current situation.
On the surface, you may say you want a certain change, but your actions show otherwise. The more clearly you can see and acknowledge the specific behaviors that are holding you back, the more you can take different actions aligned with your life goals.
Here are some examples of resistant actions and behaviors. Take note of the behaviors that have been holding you back:
- Not letting go of control
- Not delegating
- Creating drama
- Getting scattered
- Signing up for another program when you aren’t completing the actions in your current program
- Going into self-judgment, self-doubt
- Blaming others
- Comparing yourself to others
- Getting pulled into other people’s drama
- Not following through with opportunities.
- Not calling people back or saying no to an opportunity
- Letting others hold you back
- Not getting enough support
- Not reaching out for help and accessing the support that is there for you
- Watching too much T.V.
- Eating lots of sugary snacks
- Drinking too much alcohol
- Spending a lot of time with low vibration, negative people
- Not getting enough sleep
- Sleeping too much
- Saying you need a “break” instead of integrating more self-care into your daily routine
- Postponing your goals to the future by saying, “I am not ready right now” “Next year will be a better time”
- Being disorganized
- Saying “Yes” to too many activities where you begin to feel overwhelmed
- Not having a schedule or having a plan and not following it
- Projecting ill intent onto colleagues, team members
- Hiring team that isn’t able to be supportive or aren’t a right fit for the position
- Being late
This is a long list of examples, and I am sure there are more. What else would you add?
Be gentle with yourself as you notice all the forms of your resistance.
What’s the worst thing that can happen if you don’t engage in this resistant behavior? What are you afraid might happen?
Are you afraid of failing, not being liked, not making enough money, change, getting uncomfortable, growing pains?
Write down whatever your biggest fears are that keep fueling your resistant behaviors. Then take a long look at them.
What is a compassionate and proactive way to handle your resistance so that it is no longer blocking you from moving forward?
Not sure, or maybe your answer to this question was immediate. Either way, I am available to YOU to talk or walk you through this.
You know what you are no longer willing to tolerate. You understand what you need to stop doing. What you need help with is getting clear about what to do next and how to gain confidence and traction along a brighter, more sustainable path.
I get it! I’ve been there, and I still get stuck from time to time, and when I do, I get help, so I don’t end up digging myself into a deep dark hole that feels impossible to get out of.
You can reach out to me directly by sending an email to email@example.com. When you do, please share what’s holding you back with me, and I will help guide you forward.
I want you to know that most people have resistance and fear of something. Everyone is held back in their lives at least at some point in time, and not everyone stays back, stuck, and dissatisfied.
If you are listening to this right now, you are the person who wants more, is not settling for stuck, and is ready, willing, and able to do whatever it takes to move forward towards your dreams.
So let’s look at what is possible for you and waiting for you as you look out onto that bright horizon?
What do you see? What do you feel? Get in touch with this energy inside of you because this will eventually become the internal motivation that pushes you forward and gets you over the obstacles that will be in your way.
What is your vision for what you want to create? When you stop resisting, you’ll start to see the life and career you want to step into and begin walking in the right direction.
Easier said than done. It’s not all a single light bulb moment. It’s a process of self-discovery, self-excavation, and experimentation!
When you are continuously feeling dissatisfied in your career, it’s an opportunity to assess what needs to change. It could be something that needs to shift internally for you. It could also be something that needs to change externally or a combination of both.
Regardless, if you do not take the time to reflect, assess, and experiment with what needs to change, you risk heading down the wrong path. Because you will make decisions driven by fear and a lack of patience – soon to discover that you have once again hit a dead end, fallen off track, or repeated the same pattern of behavior over and over again, leading you to feelings of overwhelm, deep exhaustion and burn out.
It’s okay to hit a dead-end or fall off track. It’s part of life and the process of learning about yourself and growing as a human being.
It becomes a problem when it develops into a pattern. You look back on your life the past 10, 20, 30, 40 years. You can see that this has been your path of full-on resistance to truly stepping into what is possible for you, what you are meant for, and what it is you enjoy and want to be doing with your time and energy today, tomorrow, and for the rest of this year and the next.
So, How do you get unstuck and move forward in your career?
Follow these 5 Steps to Get Unstuck and Move Forward in Your Career:
- Get Clear on Your Priorities
- Identify Your resistant Behaviors
- Create a Vision for What You Want (not what you don’t want)
- Invest in Support to Help You Assess What Needs to Change
- Craft a Plan and Take Inspired Action
- To clarify your priorities, you can download my 3 STEPS TO REVIVE YOUR CAREER
- Go back and listen to the examples of resistant behaviors that I shared and identify those holding you back.
- Focus on what it is you truly want for yourself (not what you don’t want)
- Reach out directly to me. I am here to help offer you support and guidance. Together we will craft a plan to take the right actions that will move you forward towards creating a brighter future.
Until next time – Be Confident!